Let’s talk about a topic close to my heart—marriage. This year, 2024, my husband and I celebrated 44 years of marriage. There were times where I wondered if we would actually make it this long. I would love to tell you that after getting married it was a bed of roses every day of every year, but it wasn’t. We have had ups and downs, both of us wanted to quit at one time or another and there were times that “death do us part” were our hopes and dreams for the future. What I can tell you is that getting here in my marriage may not have been easy, but it has been the best thing I have ever done in my life.

Marriage is a beautiful, complex, and sometimes challenging journey that reflects the relationship between Christ and the Church. The Bible provides us with profound insights into what marriage should look like and how it can serve as a powerful testimony of Jesus’ love.

Marriage is a sacred covenant, established by God, to be a lifelong union between a man and a woman. In Genesis 2:24 (NIV), we read, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” This verse highlights the intimate and exclusive nature of marriage, where two individuals become one in a committed relationship.

The Apostle Paul further elaborates on the significance of marriage in Ephesians 5:25-33 (NIV): “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husband’s ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

This passage beautifully describes the mutual love and respect that should characterize a Christian marriage. Husbands are called to love their wives sacrificially, as Christ loved the church, and wives are called to respect their husbands. This mutual care and commitment create a harmonious and fulfilling relationship.

Marriage, like any other relationship, has its highs and lows. There are moments of joy and harmony, but there can also be times of conflict and misunderstanding. It’s important to remember that these challenges are a natural part of any relationship and can be opportunities for growth and deeper intimacy.

In the good times, marriage can be a source of profound joy and companionship. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NIV) reminds us of the strength found in partnership: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

However, when the bad and the ugly times come, it’s crucial to address issues promptly and seek help when needed. Just as you would call an expert to fix your car or plumbing, don’t hesitate to reach out to a Christian counselor or your pastor for guidance on improving your marriage the biblical way.

The way we conduct our marriages speaks volumes about our faith and can either draw people to Christ or push them away. A marriage that reflects Christ’s love and grace serves as a powerful testimony to the world. John 13:34-35 (NIV) says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

Conversely, if our marriages are characterized by constant conflict, disrespect, or neglect, it can harm our witness. It’s important to strive for a marriage that mirrors Christ’s love, showing the world the beauty of a relationship rooted in God.

Keeping a marriage strong and interesting requires intentional effort and commitment. Here are some ways to nurture your relationship:

1. Communicate Openly and Honestly: Regular, open communication helps build trust and understanding. Share your thoughts, feelings, and concerns with each other, and listen actively.

2. Spend Quality Time Together: Make time for each other, even amidst busy schedules. Plan regular date nights or activities that you both enjoy.

3. Pray Together: Prayer is a powerful way to connect with each other and with God. Pray for each other and for your marriage, seeking God’s guidance and blessing.

4. Serve Each Other: Acts of service, no matter how small, can show love and appreciation. Look for ways to make your spouse’s life easier and happier.

5. Keep the Romance Alive: Don’t let the romance fade. Surprise each other with thoughtful gestures, express your love and affection regularly.

6. Seek Counseling When Needed: Don’t hesitate to seek professional help if you’re facing significant challenges. A Christian counselor can provide valuable insights and strategies for overcoming difficulties.

7. Set Goals Together: Whether it’s planning for the future, personal growth, or spiritual goals, working towards common objectives can strengthen your bond.

8. Sleep Together: The intimacy that comes from being in the same bed through the night cannot be overrated. Even if your spouse snores, moves around, or gets up at night, the closeness and connection you maintain by sleeping together are invaluable.

Marry someone who shares your faith is crucial for a harmonious marriage. 2 Corinthians 6:14 (NIV) advises, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” Sharing the same faith helps ensure that your values, goals, and spiritual journey align, making it easier to navigate life’s challenges together.

Set a goal for your marriage to last until you part and be willing to fight for it. Understand that marriage requires effort and dedication and be prepared to invest in your relationship continuously. Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NIV) reminds us, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Make Christ the third strand in your marriage, providing strength and stability.

Marriage is a beautiful gift from God, designed to bring joy, companionship, and mutual growth. However, it also requires effort, commitment, and sometimes, the willingness to seek help. By following biblical principles and seeking God’s guidance, you can build a strong, loving, and enduring marriage that serves as a powerful testimony to the world.

Remember, that marriage is not always easy, but it is always worth it. Embrace the journey, cherish your spouse, and let your marriage reflect the love and grace of Jesus Christ. Blessings to you and your marriage as you strive to honor God in your relationship.